1 Draft Persuasive Writing

2 Write to a Persuasive PromptDraft Write to a Persuasive Prompt Many people have expressed concern about the starting time for high school. The school board has suggested that school begin two hours later and end two hours later. Take a position on this proposal, and write a multiple-paragraph letter to the school board to persuade them to agree with your position. The purpose for this writing is to gain baseline information about student understanding and use of persuasion. Also, you can use this information to help plan necessary lessons or mini-lessons as well as how to use lessons that follow. Feel free to substitute a different persuasive prompt. You might want to review the entire PowerPoint to make sure you don’t select one that is used for a subsequent activity or lesson. Have students save this work in a folder or notebook as they will refer back to it later. Note: On-demand writing should emulate a WASL situation which is usually a minimum of 2 hours. The writing will take at least a class period, or you could assign the writing as homework.

3 Draft Exposition vs. PersuasionOverview Exposition vs. Persuasion

4 Exposition vs. PersuasionDraft Exposition vs. Persuasion Expository writing has a narrow topic. stays focused on the main ideas. is elaborated using reasons, well-chosen and specific details, examples, and/or anecdotes to support ideas. includes information that is interesting, thoughtful, and necessary for the audience. is organized with an introduction, supporting paragraphs with main points and elaboration, and an effective conclusion. uses transitions to connect ideas. shows commitment to topic with voice and language appropriate for audience and purpose. uses specific words and phrases that help the reader understand ideas. This is the same as the expository writing checklist found in the student booklet of the WASL. Some students are not certain about the differences between persuasive writing and expository writing. Discuss the slide with your students, identifying the characteristics of expository writing prior to identifying what is distinctive to persuasion, so you’ll have a basis for comparison.

5 Exposition vs. PersuasionDraft Exposition vs. Persuasion Persuasive writing has a clear position and is focused on that position. has more than one argument to support a position. is elaborated by using reasons, well-chosen and specific details, examples, anecdotes, facts, and/or statistics as evidence to support arguments. is organized to make the best case for a position. anticipates and refutes the opposing position. begins with an opening, including a statement of position, and ending with an effective persuasive conclusion, such as a call for action. uses transitions to connect position, arguments, and evidence. shows commitment to position by writing in a voice appropriate for audience and purpose. uses words, phrases, and persuasive strategies that urge or compel the reader to support a position. This is the same as the persuasive writing checklist found in the student booklet of the WASL. There is a copy in the document folder (WASL gr 10 pers checklist.doc). Compare the characteristics of persuasion to those of exposition (on the previous slide). Have students find key characteristics of persuasion and differences between expository and persuasive writing. Note to teachers: For the purpose of the WASL, students should be writing to persuade rather than to argue. Students sometimes confuse these two. The key difference between these two approaches is that persuasive writing begins with a stance or a truth, where argumentation may lead to a solution or an opinion on how to solve an identified problem. Persuasive Writing (the writer knows a truth) results in an action or actions bringing about a desired response. The writer already has a solution in mind. Argumentative Writing (the writer discovers a truth) results in developing a conviction or making a case for a judgment or opinion. The writer discovers or explores a solution, using evidence-based reasoning to create new knowledge or find common ground.

6 Persuasive Writing – definitionDraft Persuasive Writing – definition In persuasive writing, a writer takes a position FOR or AGAINST an issue and writes to convince the reader to believe or do something.

7 Characteristics of Persuasive WritingDraft Characteristics of Persuasive Writing Clear position Audience awareness Persuasive language Rhetorical questions Semantics: Connotation vs. Denotation Euphemism Persuasive strategies Inclusion of statistics Expert testimony These characteristics are used in training WASL scorers, as a point of discussion before scoring begins. This and the next slide refer to the Persuasive Checklist found on Slide 14 and give more detail. Not all of the elements listed on slides 17 & 18 are developed for the Version One PowerPoint.

8 Characteristics of Persuasive WritingDraft Characteristics of Persuasive Writing Organizational Structures Order of Importance Causal Chain Concession/Rebuttal (or counter argument) Cause and Effect Problem/Solution Definition Combination of several structures Introductions Explanation/Definition Scenario/Anecdote Questioning Conclusions Call to action Predict outcome Offer a solution Assessment Note: Only the first six organizational structures are developed in this PowerPoint.

9 Purposes of PersuasionDraft Purposes of Persuasion Support a cause Urge people to action Promote change Refute a theory Arouse sympathy Stimulate interest Win agreement Solve a problem Activate prior knowledge in your students by discussing where persuasion already occurs in their lives. There are several approaches that teachers can use with this list. This can be a whole-class discussion. For example, the bullets are set to appear one at a time. Bring each bullet in, then ask the students for real-life examples for each one. This also could be written, charted, or done in groups, where students could come up with their examples and then post them. Students may also find pictures from magazines to represent each of the purposes. In the following 8 slides, the purposes are illustrated with photographs as examples.

10 Persuasion is Powerful Use it to:Draft Persuasion is Powerful Use it to: Urge people to action

11 Persuasion is Powerful Use it to:Draft Persuasion is Powerful Use it to: Support a cause

12 Persuasion is Powerful Use it to:Draft Persuasion is Powerful Use it to: Stir up sympathy

13 Persuasion is Powerful Use it to:Draft Persuasion is Powerful Use it to: Prove something wrong

14 Persuasion is Powerful Use it to:Draft Persuasion is Powerful Use it to: Make a change

15 Persuasion is Powerful Use it to:Draft Persuasion is Powerful Use it to: Get people to agree with you

16 Persuasion is Powerful Use it to:Draft Persuasion is Powerful Use it to: Create interest

17 What Persuades You? Why do you decide to go along with something?Draft What Persuades You? Why do you decide to go along with something? How do you convince others to go along with you? How persuasive are you? This slide is meant to set the stage for the next activity where students access their prior knowledge and ability to persuade. This is a class discussion or think /pair/ share activity. Slides provide a group activity, and you will need to decide how to form groups.

18 Who Should Win? You will be working in small groups.Draft Who Should Win? You will be working in small groups. There are only enough _______ today for one group. Think of reasons why your group should get the ______. Persuade the class that your group should be rewarded. Your group’s task is work together to write your best arguments. You will have 15 minutes. Your classmates will be voting for the best group. Keep in mind that you will not be able to vote for your own group. This is an inductive way for students to understand persuasion. This reminds students that they are already experts. Materials Chart paper Markers Bag/box of cookies or candy. If food is not appropriate for your students, pencils, pens, highlighters, etc. will work. Change the slide to match your “prize.” Decide on the size of groups that is appropriate, and place students in groups. Let students know ahead of time that they will vote for a winning group but cannot vote for themselves. Explain to students: “This game will help you understand how persuasion works--that is to see how you create and present arguments and to notice how an audience responds to your arguments. Many games involve rewards and this one is no exception. At the end of this class the winning team will receive a prize. The reward is ______________. (Cookies, candy, pencils, etc.) Work for 15 minutes and come up with the best argument for why the class should award the prize to your team. The argument can be serious or playful, factual or fictional, focusing on one member or the entire team. Appoint a recorder who will write down your group’s arguments and think about how you will present your group’s arguments to the class.”

19 Who Should Win? Present Your CaseDraft Who Should Win? Present Your Case Appoint a member of your group to draw a number to decide which team presents its case first. Decide how you will present your information (one or more people). Present your case when it’s your turn. Teams should present without interruption or questions. Take notes about each team’s position, arguments, and support (noting the team’s number). Have students draw a number for order of presenting. Beginning with team #1, have groups present their arguments. The number they draw is their group number. Make sure they understand that their order number is their team number. Everyone takes notes on each team’s arguments. Teams should present without interruption or analysis. Remind students to write the number of the team in the notes they take.

20 Who Should Win? Vote and DiscussDraft Who Should Win? Vote and Discuss Vote on which group presented the best case. You cannot vote for your own team. Each individual can only vote once. Discuss why you voted the way you did. Discuss the persuasive strategies you used or observed. Explain “Read over your notes and vote for the team with the best persuasion. You may not vote for your own group.” Students vote as individuals, not as a group. “Think about how you voted and why you voted that way. Share your thinking.” Have students discuss what they thought of the strategies. Have students name the strategies they used or saw being used. It doesn’t matter at this point if they have the correct terms. This is not a vocabulary lesson; it is a concept lesson. Chart student-named persuasive strategies used by each group. Observe what your students already know about persuasion and use the knowledge gained from this exercise to plan further instruction.

21 Persuasive Writing EssentialsDraft Persuasive Writing Essentials Audience Awareness Firm Position Persuasive Language Organizational Structure These items are essential to persuasion.

22 Persuasive Writing Position AssessmentDraft Persuasive Writing Position Persuasive Language Assessment Awareness Audience Organizational Structures Persuasive writing is recursive in nature. All of the essential elements are constantly working together to make the best case for the position. It is important to note that while each component is defined separately, they cannot be separated. They all work together recursively. We have even made this diagram as an out-of-shape circle to represent the give and take nature of this particular kind of writing.

23 Audience Awareness Know your audience before you start writing.Draft Audience Awareness Know your audience before you start writing. The audience is who will read your writing. The audience may include your teacher, your parents, your friends, or the President of the United States. Think about the needs of your reader (audience) so you can give reasons that will persuade him/her. Point out to students that sometimes you are writing for a general audience (could be read by anyone). This means the writer needs to consider a wide range of readers. Discuss the implications for knowing your audience.

24 Audience Awareness Knowing your audience helps you to decideDraft Audience Awareness Knowing your audience helps you to decide how to connect with the ideas, knowledge, or beliefs of the person or group. what information to include. how informal or formal the language should be. Take some time to define and give examples of formal and informal language. Discuss when each would be the appropriate choice. Examples: Formal marvelous Informal (slang or jargon) sweet Formal Mr. Smith, How are you today? Informal (slang or jargon) Hey Dude, ‘wasup? You could chart Formal/Informal word choice with students to highlight the differences. There will be additional discussion of this under “Persuasive Language.”

25 Audience Awareness – exampleDraft Audience Awareness – example Dear Mrs. Gillingham, Imagine you were a student, sitting in algebra when your teacher says, “Okay, get out your homework.” You rustle around in your backpack for a while until you realize -- oh no! You left your homework at home, perfectly done. Discuss with your students how this example demonstrates audience awareness (i.e., directly addresses the audience, imagines what it is like to be the teacher, sees the need to relate to another viewpoint, etc.)

26 Audience Awareness – applicationDraft Audience Awareness – application Form groups of 3 or 4. Write a short letter persuading someone to give your group a video game. You will find out your audience by drawing a card. Your teacher holds the cards. Don’t tell anyone who your audience is. Keep it secret. Do not include the name of the audience in your letter. Where you would put the name, draw a blank line. If there is something that is really hot with your students, substitute it for “video game.” Teacher will have to make cards ahead of time. Use 3 X 5 cards and make one card for each writing group. Allow each group to draw a card to find out its audience—see below for suggested audiences. Audiences may include: Bill Gates foundation (as a donation) Parents or guardians (as a gift) Grandparents (as a gift) A friend (as a loan) Local business Make sure you have a variety of audience types. A variation on this would be to have students decide what it is they would like (free car insurance, cell phone, later curfew, etc.).

27 Audience Awareness – follow upDraft Audience Awareness – follow up Each group will read its letter without naming the audience. As you listen, write down who you think the audience might be. Discuss why it was difficult or easy to figure out the audience. The discussion doesn’t need to be limited to audience but could also branch out into persuasive strategies as a whole.

28 Draft Clear Position The writer must have a clear position and stay focused on that position. Generally, the position is stated in the opening paragraph or introduction.

29 Clear Position – exampleDraft Clear Position – example Anxiety creases the brows of many students trying to finish their homework on time. If they don’t finish on time, they won’t get any credit. Having a no late homework rule is a very bad idea. Students’ grades will drop, their work will be of lesser quality, and school won’t feel as welcoming. Students won’t be able to do work worth a lot of merit. Read the student sample above. The position statement is “Having a no late homework rule is a very bad idea.” Discuss the position the student has stated and whether or not that statement is clear to the reader. Note where that statement appears in the paragraph. Relate to students that the position statement can be found anywhere within the introduction of the piece (which may be more than one paragraph). An option would be to have students rewrite this student paper attempting to place the position statement in a different place within the paragraph. Then discuss which position is the most effective and why.

30 Clear Position – Find the Position StatementDraft Clear Position – Find the Position Statement I think late homework should be accepted. Imagine you were a student sitting in your math class when your teacher says, “Okay, get out your homework!” You rustle around in your backpack for a while until you realize – oh no! You left your homework at home perfectly done. The teacher comes by your desk and you say, “I am sorry. I left my homework at home. My mom just had a baby, so I was taking care of her, and I just ran out the door without it.” Your teacher smiles at you. “It’s okay. I understand. Just bring it in tomorrow.” Isn’t that a better situation than “Oh too bad! You don’t get any credit for it”? Read the student sample above. The position statement is—”I think late homework should be accepted”. Ask students to locate the sentence that states the writer’s position concerning late homework. Note where that statement appears in the paragraph. Discuss the student’s position and indicate whether or not that statement is clear to the reader.

31 Clear Position – Find the Position StatementDraft Clear Position – Find the Position Statement “I’m sorry!” “Sorry isn’t good enough! This assignment was due yesterday, not today.” Here I am on my knees begging for mercy at my teacher’s feet. Tears forming in my eyes, I feel like an out-of-order water fountain ready to explode! I sigh and back away like a puppy dog with its tail between its legs. I slump back down in my plastic, red chair and stare at the metal desk. “I worked so hard,” I muttered silently to myself. The teacher turned her back on me and continued on with today’s lesson. I am against the no late homework rule because some students did the work but forgot it at home, and others forgot about the assignment but make it up the next day. Discuss this example with students. In this example the position statement is in the last sentence of the paragraph, “I am against the no late homework rule…”. Ask students to locate the sentence that states the writer’s position concerning late homework. Note where that statement appears in the paragraph. Discuss the student’s position and indicate whether or not that statement is clear to the reader. It is possible for students to create a qualified position. If they choose that, then that qualified position becomes their position and they need to stick to it. A variation would be to have students write a qualified position statement for this paragraph. Examples: With the no late homework issue, a qualified position may be to accept the late homework but with a reduced grade, OR some particular types of assignments could be accepted late, OR an assignment could be accepted with a note from the parent explaining the reason for the late work. Note: If you want to check for individual understanding, there is Clear Position Samples.doc in the document folder. The first page has five examples, the second page is an answer key. The students can underline the clear position statement, and the class can discuss. You’ll see that the position statement isn’t always first.

32 Clear Position – applicationDraft Clear Position – application Choose one of the purposes for persuasion. Work with a partner to choose an appropriate issue for that purpose. Write a strong position statement for that issue and purpose. This should be a complete sentence. Write an introductory paragraph that includes your position. Students should refer back to the work they did on slide 23 where they charted examples or gathered pictures for various purposes. Examples: Urge to action vote for a candidate for student office change a school rule change a home rule Create sympathy donate money to the Red Cross after a disaster don’t purchase products tested on animals

33 Persuasive Language Connotation and denotationDraft Persuasive Language Connotation and denotation Define the following words. Generate connotations. Discuss which words have positive, neutral, or negative connotations. Group, throng, mob Insinuate, suggest, imply Slow, challenged, retarded Thin, skinny, scrawny Gentle, benign, harmless Persnickety, selective, finicky, picky Create your own groupings of words with similar denotations, but varying connotations. Make sure students understand the meaning of denotation & connotation. Denotation: The most specific or direct meaning of a word in contrast to its figurative or associated meanings. Connotation: The set of associations implied by a word in addition to its literal meaning. Have students generate more connotations for words with similar denotations.

34 Persuasive Language EuphemismDraft Persuasive Language Euphemism A euphemism is the substitution of a mild, indirect, or vague expression for an expression thought of as harsh or blunt. Discuss the following and generate more euphemistic expressions for each blunt word or expression. Pass away vs. To die Powder Room vs. Toilet Humanitarian Intervention vs. War After you generate additional euphemistic expressions, ask students to identify instances where they have been aware of euphemistic expressions or when a particular writer or speaker might choose to use euphemisms instead of more direct language. “Politically Correct” or “Doublespeak” are other terms to describe euphemisms, “downsizing” instead of “fired”, for example, where the content is being deliberately disguised by a corporation to make their actions more palatable. An option here would be to find a memo or newspaper article. Underline all of the euphemisms and have the students replace them with more direct language. Discuss how this changes the impact of the persuasive message.

35 Draft Persuasive Language Persuasive language is choosing just the right words or phrases to use at just the right time with just the right audience. Strong words trigger strong feelings. Seizes Snarls Dumbstruck Effective choice of connotations Mean or strict Late fee or extended-viewing fee Used or pre-owned Surge or escalate Repeated words or phrases for emphasis I have a dream…(Martin Luther King, Jr.) Discuss with students. (The “strong words” are from the student sample that follows. Tell students to look for these words in the example.) Discuss the difference between the connotations of the words listed. Have students think of other examples. Other connotations examples: old or antique or vintage or senior cabin or vacation home shack or hut or cabin or summer home cheap or inexpensive rerun or encore presentation Have students list more examples.

36 Persuasive Language – Find Words that Could Be More EffectiveDraft Persuasive Language – Find Words that Could Be More Effective You are a high school student. Essay in one hand, you go to class. “I’m done!” You smile. The teacher takes the essay out of your hands and throws it away. She says, “It’s a day late!” You look at your hard work. The teacher didn’t look at it! The No Late Homework Rule is bad. Change the weak highlighted words to words that are more effective. Start with the word “go” and brainstorm words or phrases that are more specific and paint a better picture of the action. Take suggestions from students about words that could be changed to make this piece stronger. Brainstorm possible word substitutions. Write on chart paper. You could use a t-chart with the words on the left and suggestions on the right, or you can use eight pieces of chart paper, one for each of the words or phrases. Example: instead of “go” use meander, stomp, slide on in, saunter. Move on to the following slide where there is an example of how one student wrote this paragraph.

37 Draft Persuasive Language Imagine yourself as a high school student. Five page essay in one hand, you rush into the classroom. “I’m done! I’m done!” you pant, beaming proudly. The teacher seizes the essay out of your grasp and tears it to pieces before your eyes. She snarls, “It’s a day late!” On your knees, you stare dumbstruck at your hard work, ripped to shreds. The teacher didn’t even glance at it! The No Late Homework Rule is a cruel, horrible rule. This is an excerpt from the 2006 WASL.

38 Audience Awareness and Persuasive Language – applicationDraft Audience Awareness and Persuasive Language – application A philanthropic foundation is giving away an all-expense paid trip to Disneyland. Write a letter persuading this foundation that you deserve the gift. Select and use the precise language that would be the most persuasive for this audience. Underline specific words or phrases that you think are the most persuasive for your audience. Collect these papers and select several to show the class and discuss as a group. You may use a document camera or make overheads of the papers. Discuss with your class what persuasive language is used, and why the underlined words or phrases are persuasive or effective for the audience. A variation would be for the student to write a letter to a parent or guardian as to why he or she should be allowed to accept the gift.

39 Persuasive Organizational StructuresDraft Persuasive Organizational Structures Order of Importance Causal Chain Concession/Rebuttal Cause/Effect Problem/Solution Definition Note: Organizational structures are presented prior to introductions and conclusions so the students will have a working draft from which they can write the introductions and conclusions. Students often need the body of the paper drafted before they can apply a variety of introduction or conclusion strategies. Each of the six lessons includes transitional phrases that target the different organizational structures. In the document folder, you will find a page with all of the transitions listed (transitional phrases.doc). You may want to duplicate it for your students. You will note that these structures are taught as writing lessons, rather than activities. Feel free to adapt the amount of writing that is done; students could revise one paper, they could write paragraphs, or these lessons could be interspersed throughout the year. If students don’t understand a particular strategy, the lesson will need to be extended or repeated. The six structures that are presented are not all-inclusive. They are suggestions based on some of the structures that have been successfully used on the WASL. Structures are often used in combination. They are not intended to be mandated or formulaic patterns. Students should have many options so that they may select an appropriate organizational structure for a specific purpose.

40 Organizational StructuresDraft Organizational Structures The persuasive structures you select depend on the ideas in your paper and your audience. Persuasive organization frequently is very different from expository organization. As we look at different structures, we will see how they effect the organization of the paper. .

41 Organizational Structure – Order of ImportanceDraft Organizational Structure – Order of Importance Support for a position prioritized from most to least or least to most important This slide defines the structure.

42 Draft Order of Importance Homework should be abolished because students are too busy after school to make up for what teachers can’t seem to find time to teach during the day. Some students are athletes or participate in club activities while many students spend their after-school time working. These young adults don’t have time to re-work algebra problems! If you’re a successful athlete, you may be lucky enough to get money to go to college – that’s more important than recopying an essay! Clubs may serve as practice for the work force. But what really counts in a teen’s life would be to work in order to live, help out the family by taking care of siblings, or save money for college. In the face of these responsibilities or chances to improve life, what student would instead choose to review history notes? The student starts with athletics. Then he/she moves to work with an emphasis on earning money for college and indicating that it’s more important than after-school activities. Then, the student moves to helping the family. “But what really counts” indicates that the most important point is coming last.

43 Order of Importance – Discuss ApproachesDraft Order of Importance – Discuss Approaches Recently, a citizen’s group proposed a change to the rules for obtaining a driver’s license. The group has proposed that high school students have at least a “B” average in order to get a driver’s license. Take a position on this proposal. Write a letter to the editor of your local paper to persuade voters to agree with your position. Have students read the prompt and consider the position they might take on this issue. Discuss with your students that the editor of the newspaper is the initial audience, but their letter will need to reach a wider general audience who will read it in the newspaper. On the next slide, students will be brainstorming arguments to use in the organizational structure. You will need either copies of this prompt, or you will need to copy it on the board or chart.

44 Order of Importance – applicationDraft Order of Importance – application Think about the prompt on the previous slide. Take a position on the issue. Brainstorm arguments that support your position. List your arguments in two ways: From most important to least important. From least important to most important. Discuss Which order seems to be the best fit for your audience? Why? Organize - Order of importance Print out copies of the prompt on the previous slide, or copy it on the board so students can see it as they work. One approach to this activity would be to use post-its for their arguments, so they are more easily rearranged. Students could work individually or in small groups. By practicing how to organize in two different ways, students begin to understand how sequence can influence the strength of the persuasion. Students need to decide which structure seems most persuasive and should be able to articulate why they selected the order they did.

45 Order of Importance – Transitional PhrasesDraft Order of Importance – Transitional Phrases Of most importance Primarily Significantly Of particular concern Foremost, furthermore The most, greatest In particular Most bothersome Particularly difficult The worst Of greatest concern Of less (or least) importance These transitions are particularly well-suited for the order of importance organizational structure. You may need to define these transitions and give examples of how they might be used. Elicit ideas from students. Feel free to work with this list with your students by soliciting additional order of importance transitional phrases. On the next slide, there are other ideas for working in the transitional phrases.

46 Order of Importance – applicationDraft Order of Importance – application Prompt Recently, a citizen’s group proposed a change to the rules for obtaining a driver’s license. The group has proposed that high school students have at least a “B” average in order to get a driver’s license. Take a position on this proposal. Write a letter to the editor of your local paper to persuade voters to agree with your position. Apply the order of importance strategy to your paper. Select and apply appropriate transitions as you write. One of the approaches to try would be to put the transitional phrases on an overhead, and to try several in their sample paragraph or paper. Or, have the students note several transitions on their papers that they choose to work with, underlining them as they use the phrases. Sometimes students want to know exactly how many transitions they should use; there is no precise answer. Content dictates what is necessary to add clarity.

47 Organizational Structure – Causal ChainDraft Organizational Structure – Causal Chain A culminating chain of events where one action leads to the next (snowball or domino effect) This slide defines the structure.

48 Draft Causal Chain For me school starts at 7:30, which means I need to leave my house at 7:00 or 7:05. But for other students who ride the bus they must be ready far earlier than that. I see people half asleep standing outside waiting for that big yellow bus to take them to a long, tiring day at school. I think if school started later it would put many people at ease. Even if you get that extra half an hour of sleep, it can do wonders. You won’t be tired for that first period test, you won’t have to take that nap second period and miss your history notes, and you won’t miss breakfast and have to spend class time counting down the minutes to lunch. Many things would be so much better if school started later. The paragraph is structured with an ‘if/then’ causal chain. The structure begins with lack of sleep, then shows what happens as the day progresses because of the lack of sleep.

49 Causal Chain – DefinitionDraft Causal Chain – Definition This is about a ballooning cause and effect. Event A causes event B, which in turn causes event C, etc. This organizational structure may be used for an entire essay or just a portion of it. Other terms to describe a causal chain are the domino effect or snowball effect.

50 Causal Chain Read the sample papers.Draft Causal Chain Read the sample papers. Identify the sections of each paper that match the definition of causal chain. There are two sample papers on one page in the document folder (causal chain.doc). Page one is an unmarked student copy while page two is a highlighted answer key. The first sample paper is from the 2002 WASL where the writer utilizes a causal chain in two separate places. The second sample is from a newspaper where the writers also use a causal chain structure. Either in pairs or small groups, have students identify the causal chains in the papers.

51 Causal Chain – Transitional PhrasesDraft Causal Chain – Transitional Phrases After Consequently Since, because Before Meanwhile, while At that time Preceding Although Earlier Finally During Every time Soon Simultaneously As a result This will lead to These transitions are particularly well-suited for the causal chain organizational structure. You may need to define these transitions and give examples of how they might be used. Elicit ideas from students. Feel free to work with this list with your students by soliciting additional causal chain transitional phrases. When students write a paragraph to the prompt on the next slide, have them use at least one or two and underline them. On the next slide, there are other ideas for working in the transitional phrases.

52 Causal Chain – applicationDraft Causal Chain – application Prompt To improve student learning, the school board is proposing required daily homework for every class. Take a position on this proposal. In a multi-paragraph letter, persuade the school board to support your position. Apply the causal chain strategy to your paper. Select and apply appropriate transitions as you write. Students already have copies of the two sample papers from the Document Folder (causal chain.doc). They can refer to the examples as they work. One of the approaches to try would be to put the transitional phrases on an overhead and to have students try several in their sample paragraph or paper. Or, have the students note several transitions on their papers that they choose to work with, underlining them as they use the phrases. Sometimes students want to know exactly how many transitions they should use; there is no precise answer. Content dictates what is necessary to add clarity. An alternative to this assignment would be to have students return to a paper they have already written and apply the causal chain structure and transitions. Have students turn in this assignment; check for understanding. If student understanding is incomplete, the lesson can be extended or repeated.

53 Organizational Structure – Concession/RebuttalDraft Organizational Structure – Concession/Rebuttal Recognizing the opposing viewpoint Conceding something may have some merit Then countering with another argument This slide defines the structure.

54 Take this! Take that! (Think about both sides of an issue.)Draft Take this! Take that! (Think about both sides of an issue.) You have been asked to be on a committee to review your high school’s rules. Choose one rule that needs to be revised, added, or eliminated. Using the “Take this” form, write down your rule. Trade your paper with a partner. Counter argument comes before concession/rebuttal. This activity relies solely on countering an argument (there is no concession). Duplicate and distribute the Take This form.doc in the Document Folder. There is also a Take This dialogue.doc in the Document Folder that can be read aloud as an example or optionally in a role-playing context. First, have students quickly write down the rule they want to be revised, added, or eliminated. Pair off and exchange forms.

55 Draft Take this! Take that! Acting as principal, respond to your partner’s paper with your own arguments. When you get your own paper back, counter the principal’s argument from a student viewpoint. Repeat, following the same procedure. Repeat procedure once more. Your paper, when complete, will be argument and counter-argument. Emphasize that each partner must think about the other person's rule so they can take an opposing viewpoint. Have students then engage in an argument in writing. They are to argue the issue back and forth in a paper exchange, each challenging or countering the other's point of view. Each time the paper is exchanged, the role is switched from student to principal. There is a student sample of this activity in the document folder (Take this student sample.doc) if your students need to see a sample.

56 Take this! Take that! DiscussionDraft Take this! Take that! Discussion Form a new group with two new people for a discussion. Each person reads his/her paper . Select one paper from the group and discuss the answers to the following questions: Were the counter arguments effective? What made them effective or not? Were you persuaded? Why or why not? After small group discussion, as a whole group, discuss this activity. You may have students read some examples aloud for the class if time allows. Anticipate that students may fall into a “did not, did too” discussion that goes nowhere. Instead, encourage students to see that for counter argument to work, it is used sparingly. In the next slide, the lesson bridges into concession and rebuttal, which may be more effective than argument and counter argument.

57 Take it up a notch! What do the words concession/rebuttal mean to you?Draft Take it up a notch! What do the words concession/rebuttal mean to you? Where have you experienced concession? Where have you experienced rebuttal? Defend why it might be a good idea to use concession and rebuttal. Ask students: What do the words concession/rebuttal mean to you? Brainstorm as a class, discuss, then check with a dictionary definition. Collate various definitions. Continue the discussion about where students have experienced concession/rebuttal. Start class the next day by asking students to define concession & rebuttal to test what they remember. Counter argument stops short of conceding because it doesn’t recognize or acknowledge the other side’s point of view. Concession is giving up something to gain another advantage. Rebuttal must disprove what you concede (don’t argue the other side).

58 Draft Concession/Rebuttal There is nothing more important to students than the ability to express their unique sense of self. Whether it’s grunge, goth, or glam, each student at our high school is a person whose voice must be heard. Dress codes would turn us all into a bland, uniform mass of white and navy. Having a school dress code might improve discipline, which might be true in schools where students fight over shoes, but enforcing a dress code will cause student rebellion, generating even more discipline issues than we have now. Some say a dress code will reduce the numbers of cliques in school, but students will adapt and find new ways to express themselves. Hairstyles, piercings, and tattoos will not just prove which group the student belongs to, but will make students even more of a discipline problem when the tattoos permanently express youth distress. We are still individuals and should be allowed to express ourselves, and allowed our civil rights. Students must never be forced to wear uniforms at the school board’s wishes. “Might improve discipline” is a concession – the rebuttal is that students will rebel more. “Might reduce cliques” is a concession – hairstyles, etc., will still identify groups is the rebuttal.

59 Draft Concession/Rebuttal A reader of your essay is more likely to listen to you if you show you can see his/her point of view before you counter that argument. Concession is when you acknowledge or consider the opposing viewpoint, conceding something that has some merit. Rebuttal is when your own argument proves the other side to be flawed, and shows your argument is stronger. Read the Cell Phone articles and highlight areas of concession and rebuttal. Use cell phone articles cell phones yes.doc, cell phones no.doc in the document folder to have students highlight the sections that are examples of concession and rebuttal. There is an answer key on page two for each article.

60 Concession/Rebuttal – Looking at the Other SideDraft Concession/Rebuttal – Looking at the Other Side Concession is a strategy. Concede only one or two points. Choose what you concede strategically. Rebuttal is a strategy. Not everything needs rebuttal. Rebut the most important or most easily supported points. Students have used Concession/Rebuttal successfully on the WASL. Conceding to an opposing point is a hallmark of good persuasive writing. It’s important that students understand that not every paragraph has to have a concession or a rebuttal. Perhaps the most important point needs concession and rebuttal, but that is the strategic aspect of persuasive writing. There is a graphic organizer in the document folder (Concessionform.doc) that you can choose to use with your students if they need more practice. In addition there is a Concession form planner.doc that may be used to help students begin. Optional activity: If students are having difficulty with concession/rebuttal, you can try a role-play where one student is a parent and the other is a son/daughter wanting to go to a concert. Here you can have them see the difference between counter arguing and when an individual concedes and rebuts. See the Concession Concert.doc in the document folder for an example. Reminder: If you use the graphic organizer, make sure the students understand that not every point needs rebuttal. It’s better to develop fewer points in depth, than many points superficially.

61 Concession/Rebuttal – Transitional PhrasesDraft Concession/Rebuttal – Transitional Phrases It is true that…however…therefore… Certainly…but…in short… Admittedly…on the other hand…so… Of course…nevertheless…as a result… Obviously…on the contrary…finally… Sure…however…in addition… There are certain transitions that signal concession and rebuttal or counter argument. However, they should not become formulaic by being prescribed. You may need to discuss these transitions and give examples of how they might be used. Elicit additional ideas from students. (Some suggestions are below.) Additional examples: One might argue . . . For the most part Under these conditions . . . Perhaps, possibly, it is possible It must be granted No doubt If it were so In some cases It seems, it may be, in effect

62 Concession/Rebuttal – example oneDraft Concession/Rebuttal – example one Find the transitions in this paragraph. It is true that students should not have headphones on when their teachers are giving a lesson. Students should not be allowed to block out their teachers. However, when every member of the class is working individually after important information has been given, listening to music can be a helpful learning tool. It would create a more relaxing, calm environment for learning. Some students can concentrate more while listening to music. As a result grades could go up and it would definitely make school more enjoyable. Therefore, our school should allow headphones in the classroom. These examples are excerpts from the grade 10 WASL. The next slide has the transitions underlined.

63 Concession/Rebuttal – student sampleDraft Concession/Rebuttal – student sample Example 1 It is true that students should not have headphones on when their teachers are giving a lesson. Students should not be allowed to block out their teachers. However, when every member of the class is working individually after important information has been given, listening to music can be a helpful learning tool. It would create a more relaxing, calm environment for learning. Some students can concentrate more while listening to music. As a result grades could go up and it would definitely make school more enjoyable. Therefore, our school should allow headphones in the classroom. Notice the transitional phrases from the previous slide (underlined here). This example includes concession /rebuttal as well as a causal chain.

64 Concession/Rebuttal – student sampleDraft Concession/Rebuttal – student sample Example 2 Find the transitions – some were not listed. Certainly, some students abuse the absentee policy and lie about being sick. They usually try to get out of school for one reason or the other. But the majority of students stay home because they are sick. When a student is sick, he should be focusing on getting better, not worrying about missing classes and grades. Also when a student comes to school when he is sick because he doesn’t want to lose credits, he is not helping himself. Chances are he'll have trouble concentrating and won't learn anything. In fact, he will probably be spreading germs to other students. The bottom line is a student has no control over when he is going to get sick. It would be better for everyone if excused absences were dismissed. Notice that this author chose to use different transitional phrases than we saw on the earlier slide. The next slide will have the transitions underlined.

65 Concession/Rebuttal – student sampleDraft Concession/Rebuttal – student sample Example 2 Certainly, some students abuse the absentee policy and lie about being sick. They usually try to get out of school for one reason or the other. But the majority of students stay home because they are sick. When a student is sick, he should be focusing on getting better, not worrying about missing classes and grades. Also when a student comes to school when he is sick because he doesn’t want to lose credits, he is not helping himself. Chances are he'll have trouble concentrating and won't learn anything. In fact, he will probably be spreading germs to other students. The bottom line is a student has no control over when he is going to get sick. It would be better for everyone if excused absences were dismissed. Notice that this author chose to use different transitional phrases than we saw on the earlier slide.

66 Concession/Rebuttal – applicationDraft Concession/Rebuttal – application Look at your arguments from your Take This! Take That! activity. Include your best arguments in a multiple-paragraph letter convincing your principal to your position. Apply concession/rebuttal strategies. Select and apply appropriate transitions as you write. Please remind students that the entire paper doesn’t need to be comprised of concessions and rebuttals, but that the strategy should be used purposefully. Encourage students to include examples and detail.

67 Organizational Structure – Cause/EffectDraft Organizational Structure – Cause/Effect Explain why something happened and what came about as a result. This slide defines the structure.

68 Cause/Effect – exampleDraft Cause/Effect – example Just stay home. The unexcused absence policy at our school is ineffective and needs to be changed. Currently, this policy actually encourages misbehaving. If students skip class, they get one hour of detention. If they then fail to report to detention for three days in a row, they receive one day of at-home suspension. Therefore, this policy punishes a student who skips class by letting them stay home. This actually gives the student more time away from school – just what the school doesn’t want. Discuss this example with students. Discuss why this is an effective structure for this issue. There are elements of a causal chain here. However, the structure of an action being taken, and a consequence, is strongly cause/effect.

69 Cause/Effect – applicationDraft Cause/Effect – application The school board is considering closing campus during lunch, due to community safety concerns and complaints from local business owners. Write a letter to the school board from the point of view of either a community member or a business owner in which you persuade the board to close campus to reduce lunch-time problems. Have students consider the two different points of view and concerns that might be specific to them. Then, students need to consider the different causes for the problem and different effects.

70 Cause/Effect – applicationDraft Cause/Effect – application Read the prompt and consider the respective points of view on the issue. Select the point of view from which you want to write. Consider the different causes for the problem and different effects. Use the appropriate cause/effect transitions. Organize – Cause/Effect Print out copies of the prompt on the previous slide, or copy it on the board so students can see it as they work. They will also need the list of the transitions on the following slide.

71 Cause/Effect – Transitional PhrasesDraft Cause/Effect – Transitional Phrases Because As a result of Consequently Due to Since For this reason Accordingly For Therefore Hence Furthermore If/Then Thus Although Owing to So These transitions are particularly well-suited for the cause/effect organizational structure. You may need to define these transitions and give examples of how they might be used. Elicit ideas from students. Feel free to work with this list with your students by soliciting additional cause/effect transitional phrases.

72 Organizational Structure – Problem/SolutionDraft Organizational Structure – Problem/Solution Explain the problem or issue, and suggest how it can be solved. This slide defines the structure.

73 Problem/Solution – exampleDraft Problem/Solution – example Because the world dumps tons of garbage and waste onto the planet every day, recycling should become the law. The real problem is that every week, each family of four generates enough trash to fill two 32 gallon garbage cans. This happens because people are lazy, have busy lives, and buy products with excessive packaging. If people knew there was an immediate consequence for this waste, they would be more inclined to recycle. We must acknowledge that no one likes to pay a fine or have the government tell them what to do, but if recycling were required, we could reduce the amount of trash produced by at least 50%. The best solution to curbing pollution is to enforce recycling by law. Discuss this example with your students. Identify the elements of the problem/solution structure as well as the transitional elements. Students will need a copy of this paragraph. The problem of pollution is identified and elaborated upon. The solution is offered with an implied consequence. Note also that there is a concession/rebuttal statement (We must acknowledge…) Transitional elements are: The real problem We must acknowledge The best solution is

74 Problem/Solution – Transitional PhrasesDraft Problem/Solution – Transitional Phrases A possible remedy The best solution A better way A feasible solution The proposed solution The real problem is The underlying issue is The specific problem We must acknowledge These transitions are particularly well-suited for the problem/solution organizational structure. You may need to define these transitions and give examples of how they might be used. Elicit ideas from students. Feel free to work with this list with your students by soliciting additional problem/solution transitional phrases.

75 Problem/Solution – Generate a TopicDraft Problem/Solution – Generate a Topic Brainstorm several problems within our school or community.  Select one you know the most about and consider possible solutions to this problem.  Decide who could take action on your solution and how to persuade this audience that your proposal is feasible and should have their support.  Consider carefully what questions readers might ask and how you would respond to questions or objections. After charting possible problems and solutions, have the class choose a problem that they will all respond to. Review the sample paragraph for the problem/solution elements including identifying the problem, proposing the solution, countering the opposition, and using transitions.

76 Problem/Solution – applicationDraft Problem/Solution – application Refer to your notes from the previous activity. Refer back to the sample paragraph. Present the problem, and define it clearly. Propose a feasible solution. Anticipate and address opposition. Write a paragraph where you include all the elements of problem, solution, and opposition. Organize – Problem/Solution (As mentioned previously, make sure students have a print-out of the sample paragraph on the earlier slide.) The proposal writer must be sure that readers know what the problem is.  The writer may also have to establish that the problem exists and is serious enough to need solving.  Once the problem is established, the writer must present and argue for a particular solution.  Be sure that your topic is narrow and that your solutions are reasonable. The main purpose of a proposal is to convince readers that the writer's solution is the best way of solving the problem.  Proposals argue for their solutions by trying to demonstrate:  that the proposed solution will solve the problem  that it is a feasible way of solving the problem  that it stands up against anticipated objections or reservations  that it is better than other ways of solving the problem Problem-solution writers must use a reasonable tone.  It is important to advance the argument without "having" an argument.  The goal is to narrow any differences that may exist between writer and readers, not widen it.

77 Organizational Structure – DefinitionDraft Organizational Structure – Definition Define the elements of a concept, and explain how, or whether or not, your definition fits or does not fit. This slide defines the structure.

78 Draft Definition – example Just because the food gets to your table quickly, this doesn’t mean that the breakfast café down the street is a fast food restaurant. If there is a waitress or a waiter, you know you’re not in a fast food restaurant. If there’s a menu on the table and not on a display over the cash register, then you’re not eating fast food. When you eat with a plate and utensils, you pay for your meal after you eat, and are expected to tip the server, then you’re not at a fast food restaurant. The meal may be greasy, quick, and cheap, but that’s not enough to tell you that where you are is a fast food restaurant. The key elements of fast food meals are pre-paid, packaged, served perfunctorily without wait-staff, and selected from a sign over the cashier’s head. Discuss this example with your students. The elements of a restaurant vs. a fast food chain are clearly identified. Students will need a copy of this paragraph. Fast food is defined by negation – saying what it is not – and then concluded with a strong statement of what it is. Transitional elements are: This doesn’t mean If/then That’s not enough to tell you The key elements

79 Definition – Transitional PhrasesDraft Definition – Transitional Phrases To illustrate This means/doesn’t mean That’s not enough to define This signifies/constitutes A key element of Within the category of The first criteria is Other transitions that may help for this structure If/then In contrast For example To explain Whereas Furthermore As well as These transitions are particularly well-suited for the definition organizational structure. You may need to define these transitions and give examples of how they might be used. Elicit ideas from students. Feel free to work with this list with your students by soliciting additional definition transitional phrases. Have students underline the transitional elements in the model paragraph.

80 Definition – Discuss ApproachesDraft Definition – Discuss Approaches If a student falls asleep in class, is this a disrespectful action? Take a stand, and using a definition of ‘disrespect’, persuade that your interpretation is the right one. Have students list criteria for what constitutes disrespect. Also have them list examples of disrespectful actions. What do these actions all have in common? What categories do the disrespectful actions fall into? That will clarify what assumptions the students have made. (i.e., has to be rude, must be on purpose, usually disruptive). These are two approaches – criteria and examples -- students can use when applying the definition strategy. As a class, write a definition for ‘disrespectful’. When using the organizational structure, you may define a word; it may be either a specific term or abstract notion. Your analysis should go beyond the dictionary meaning of the word. You should do your best to explain the reasons why this word is referred to as such. You can give a direct definition of the term, limiting your definition essay just to the mere clarification of the term. Don’t use the words "when", "where", giving a definition. A common practice is to define the noun with a noun, adjective with adjective and so on. Providing examples is an effective form of evidence when defining a word. Criteria are also used to define a concept. Remember that definition is not a repetition. Use simple and well-known terms in your explanation. Point out the distinguishing features of the term.

81 Definition – applicationDraft Definition – application The administration at your school is considering lack of preparation for class (no books, paper, pencil, etc.) a disrespectful action, and therefore will require a disciplinary referral. Take a stand on this issue, and write a paragraph to persuade your principal that lack of preparation is or is not a disrespectful action.

82 Persuasive Organizational StructuresDraft Persuasive Organizational Structures Identification Note: Organizational structures are presented prior to introductions and conclusions so the students will have a working draft from which they can write the introductions and conclusions. Students often need the body of the paper thought through before they can apply a variety of introduction or conclusion strategies. First, there is an overview of six different organizational structures. The six structures that are presented are not all-inclusive. They are suggestions based on the types of structures that have been successfully used on the WASL. Bear in mind that structures can blend. They are not intended to be mandated formulaic patterns. Each of the six lessons includes transitional phrases that target the different organizational structures. Having different strategies with which they’re familiar will give students options, depending on the prompt.

83 Persuasive Organizational StructuresDraft Persuasive Organizational Structures Order of importance Topics are prioritized from most to least or least to most Causal chain A culminating chain of events where one thing leads to the next (snowball or domino effect) Organization in persuasive writing (3 slides) Definitions for each of the structure types are on the presentation slides and in the document folder (Org Structures def.doc). Provide students with hard copies of structures, or, you could display the samples provided on a document camera and have students take notes. Review with students these definitions.

84 Persuasive Organizational StructuresDraft Persuasive Organizational Structures Concession/Rebuttal Organization Acknowledging or recognizing the opposing viewpoint Conceding something that has some merit Then countering with another argument

85 Persuasive Organizational StructuresDraft Persuasive Organizational Structures Cause/effect Explain why something happened, and what came about as a result. Problem/solution Explain the problem or issue, and suggest how it can be solved. Definition Define the elements of a concept, and explain how, or whether or not, your definition fits. Combination Effective papers often use a combination of several structures.

86 Name that Organizational Structure!Draft Name that Organizational Structure! Get into groups of 4. Have your definitions for organizational structures with you. Open your envelope. Sort your sentences to make whole paragraphs. Review definitions sheet, and determine which definition is the best fit for your paragraph. Find and copy the document entitled org structure cuts.doc Cut apart the sentences as formatted, and place each paragraph into an envelope or folder. Do not include the title (structure used). Keep a key for yourself. (Org structure samples.doc) Put students into mixed ability groups of 4 (adjust as necessary for your classroom). Give each group one envelope, and make sure they DON’T open it early! Show this directions slide. Make sure students have their handout of structures with definitions. To make this fun, feel free to reward the group somehow.

87 Apply an Organizational StructureDraft Apply an Organizational Structure The high school is considering requiring each student to donate 30 hours of time to help your community. What do you think about this plan? Take a position, and write a letter to the school board persuading them to support your position. Try out a structure you haven’t tried before. Write one paragraph, and identify the sentences that prove it fits that structure. Then, label the whole paragraph with which structure you used. Feel free to select a persuasive prompt that fits whatever you happen to be working on. This is the last piece of the Organizational structures lesson where the students apply what they’ve learned to a new situation. Rather than write a whole essay, have the students write a paragraph (or two) to prove they can replicate the pattern.

88 Persuasive IntroductionsDraft Persuasive Introductions Materials needed: Bring in real-life writing. Find sample introductions and conclusions – newspaper letters to the editor, newspaper editorials, sports columns (Rick Reilly), persuasive essays in collections. You will need both kinds of samples for activities in this section and the next.

89 Introductions Purpose grabs the reader’s attention.Draft Introductions Purpose grabs the reader’s attention. implies an organizational structure of the paper. is connected to the body of the writing and is a clear lead-in to the position. includes a position that is stated or implied. Remind the students that there are important purposes for the introductions. Bring in real-life writing. Find sample introductions – newspaper letters to the editor, newspaper editorials, sports columns (Rick Reilly), persuasive essays in collections – and read out loud to give the students an idea of the variety of possible introductions. The next slide will take your students through specific types of persuasive introductions.

90 Ineffective Persuasive IntroductionDraft Ineffective Persuasive Introduction I am strongly against your proposal for required homework in every class for many good reasons. Some of these reasons are that there is too much homework already, kids want to have fun in school, and finally, everyone would have to work harder. I will begin by telling you why I think we have too much homework. How could this example be improved? Why doesn’t it grab the reader’s attention? (Vague reasons, redundant language, implies a possible expository organizational structure)

91 Introductions Some persuasive introduction strategiesDraft Introductions Some persuasive introduction strategies Scenario/Anecdote: The writer provides hypothetical or personal examples to illustrate the topic. Inquiry/Questioning: The writer asks thought-provoking, maybe even edgy, questions to capture the reader’s interest. Preparatory Definition/Explanation: The writer defines or explains the subject before discussing it in detail. The next 3 slides will provide sample introductions. Read the samples out loud, identify with the class the introduction strategy used, and discuss how it meets the purpose of a persuasive introduction. Note: Scenarios are often hypothetical, and anecdotes are real-life.

92 Introductions – sample oneDraft Introductions – sample one Who in their right mind thought that high school students should get up in the dark when their natural rhythm is just the opposite? Who in their right mind would put the most inexperienced drivers on the road before the sun is even up? What parents in their right minds would sign up for a morning fight 180 days a year? What teacher in his or her right mind would want to motivate a somnambulant first period class? Only someone who is actually in their right mind would move the start time of high school to a sensible 10 am. Have students identify which strategy was used in this introduction. This WASL excerpt is an example of questioning as an introduction strategy. Note: a part of the discussion might be that the sorts of questions you ask should lead to an understanding of your position.

93 Introductions – sample twoDraft Introductions – sample two The majority of high schools have kept a starting time that was begun in the 1920’s when students needed to get back to their farms to tend to chores. This means that class still starts at 7:30 am, which current research proves is the worst time for the teen mind. Why then do we continue to use a system that we know doesn’t work well for the very students that the school is trying to teach? To ensure student success, we must change our schedule to start school at 10 am. Have students identify which strategy was used in this introduction. This WASL excerpt is a preparatory definition or explanation as an introduction strategy. Note: while this is a difficult approach, it is frequently used. Make sure your students see that the definition should lead the reader to an understanding of your position on the topic.

94 Introductions – sample threeDraft Introductions – sample three It is 5:45 a.m. Time to get up. “Mom, just a little longer,” I beg. Six o’clock rolls around; time to get up. “OK, Mom. I am getting up,” I say as my eyes drift back shut. It is now 6:25 and I spring up out of bed and try to get ready in time to leave at 7:00. Skipping breakfast, a mistake I will regret later, this is my typical morning. So, as a high school student, I know the concerns that people have expressed about the starting time for school. School starts too early, and I agree it should be started later and held an equal time longer. Have students identify which strategy was used in this introduction. This WASL excerpt is a scenario/anecdote as an introduction strategy. Note: the anecdote reinforces the position that will be argued. (A scenario is often hypothetical, an anecdote is real-life.)

95 Introductions – student sample oneDraft Introductions – student sample one First draft Today the cell phone is considered a prerequisite for becoming a teenager. The sound of a ring or a buzz has become normal and is often dismissed as nothing. Some schools however are taking a stand against the wireless device. Schools in New York often use metal detectors not only to catch knives and guns but also cell phones. The cell phone has had nothing but a bad influence in schools because many students use them to cheat on tests, text during class, or take inappropriate pictures in the locker room. Revised draft The class is silently taking a test and every student is concentrating for the last few precious moments. Suddenly the theme song from the O.C. comes on. Every child’s head is turned to the noise; the blushing student says sorry and hurriedly turns his phone to vibrate. The teacher then collects the papers even though many have blanks at the bottom. Cell phones in schools are just another nuisance many students could live without. This slide is set up so that you can show the students the first draft. Discuss with them possible changes to make the introduction more effective before clicking the mouse to fly in the revised example. Why is the second version more effective? Refer back to purposes for introductions. While there is more content in the first draft, it goes beyond what an introduction needs to do. All the main points of an essay do not need to be listed in the introduction. The revised introduction is meant to grab your attention and establish the position.

96 Introductions – student sample twoDraft Introductions – student sample two First draft Cell phones have become more and more frequently used in our modern and technologically advanced lives. Many people, mostly men and women from older generations, become quite annoyed when someone whips out their cell phone in a public place or right in the middle of a personal conversation. But when cell phones are used at appropriate times and for appropriate purposes, they make our lives so much more convenient. Cell phones should be left to use in the hands of Lawrence Public school students during school under the right guidelines. Cell phones provide easy communication between students in making after school arrangements and for medical and safety purposes. Revised draft “Ring! Ring!” Suzy Sophomore reaches into her purse to find her pink Razor. “Goodness, I’m so sorry; I thought I turned this thing off.” Everyone’s eyes divert to Suzy as some of the other students snicker and Mr. Nelson rolls his eyes, waiting impatiently. Mr. Nelson casually strides over to Suzy’s desk and takes away the phone for the rest of the period. This has happened twice today in his class, and he is becoming quite agitated for this interruption during his lesson. Instances such as these occur frequently in Lawrence Public Schools. Having a “No cell phone on school grounds” policy would prevent these occurrences and would benefit students and teachers greatly. This slide is set up so that you can show the students the first draft. Discuss with them possible changes to make the introduction more effective before clicking the mouse to fly in the revised example. Why is the second version more effective? Refer back to purposes for introductions. (Notice she changed her position here)

97 Introduction Strategies – applicationDraft Introduction Strategies – application Return to your baseline paper (“Starting School Two Hours Later”). Consider introduction strategies you have learned and revise your introduction to make it more effective. Turn in your original copy and the revision. You might consider modeling each introduction strategy before having students select and apply. There is also a document in the document folder (intro samples.doc) which has the three examples (labeled) from the PowerPoint on one page. Have students write a revision of the introduction to their baseline paper. If you prefer, another paper can be selected. Another option is to have them use one strategy on their own papers and a different strategy on the ineffective introduction found in the PowerPoint.

98 Persuasive ConclusionsDraft Persuasive Conclusions

99 Persuasive ConclusionsDraft Persuasive Conclusions Purpose clearly connects introduction and body of the paper. gives a sense of completion. does more than restate your arguments and position. gives the reader something to think about. Discuss the purposes with your students. Remind the students that there are important purposes for conclusions. Bring in real-life writing. Find sample conclusions – newspaper letters to the editor, newspaper editorials, sports columns (Rick Reilly), persuasive essays in collections – and read out loud to give the students an idea of the variety of possible conclusions. The next slide will take your students through specific types of persuasive conclusions.

100 Conclusion StrategiesDraft Conclusion Strategies Call to Action: the writer implores the audience to change. Offer a Solution: the writer suggests some possibilities to resolve the problem posed. Make a Prediction: similar to a startling statement, this can be a warning or an encouragement. Using the samples you brought in, have students, in pairs or groups, identify which strategy was used. Although students usually understand these strategies, they often fail to elaborate.* *For more information on Elaboration, see the Elaboration instructional module found on the OSPI website.

101 An Ineffective ConclusionDraft An Ineffective Conclusion I have given you three truthful explanations of why daily homework is an abomination to the high school. This is due to problems with participants in after school events, the time we spend with our families, and our jobs. Thank you for allowing me to express my feelings. How could this example be improved? (Doesn’t give a sense of completion, is only a restatement of the arguments and position, doesn’t give the reader anything to think about beyond what has already been stated)

102 Conclusions – Call to ActionDraft Conclusions – Call to Action Include a final appeal to reinforce your argument. Clearly and forcefully state your desired action. Give information needed to take that recommended action. The next slide will provide a sample conclusion with a call to action.

103 Conclusions – Call to Action – student sampleDraft Conclusions – Call to Action – student sample Daily mandatory homework for high school students would serve no real worthwhile purpose but to unnecessarily stress out students and teachers alike. Teachers and students are busy, stressed, preoccupied, and quite frankly, strung-out enough as it is without this. Please, I urge you not to put this in effect. Not simply because I don’t want homework for all seven classes every day, but because it would truly be detrimental to everyone actively participating in the public school now and in the future. Read the sample out loud, and discuss what distinguishes this conclusion as a call to action. I urge you It would truly be detrimental

104 Conclusions – Offer a SolutionDraft Conclusions – Offer a Solution Restate the problem. Define and develop the solution. Focus on the strengths of the solution. This strategy differs from a call to action. More of a recommendation Stresses the solution to a problem Definition

105 Conclusions – Offer a Solution – student sampleDraft Conclusions – Offer a Solution – student sample According to high schools with the highest test scores across the country, homework is only necessary when an individual student doesn’t understand a concept or needs additional practice. Therefore, mandatory homework in every class would be meaningless. Instead, teachers should assign homework on an individual basis. This solution would provide students with needed practice without needless busywork for students and endless grading for teachers. When students work on just their own weaknesses, rather than work assigned to the whole class, they will quickly see improvement and will be more motivated to stay in school. Read the sample out loud, and discuss what distinguishes this conclusion as offering a solution. Instead, teachers should This solution would

106 Conclusions – Make a PredictionDraft Conclusions – Make a Prediction Takes the argument a step further than a summary Keeps the reader thinking after reading your essay Is based on the main points (arguments), creating joy, hope, gloom, suspense, etc. Draws reader’s attention to the significance of the argument Discuss the definition, and then read the following example on the next slide. The next slide will provide a sample conclusion that makes a prediction.

107 Conclusions – Make a Prediction – student sampleDraft Conclusions – Make a Prediction – student sample Imagine an empty classroom. As students trickle in, without a word, they immediately take out a piece of paper and a pencil to start writing down today’s homework assignment. The teacher walks to the front of the class to admire her focused students as they work silently. Ring! Class is in session. We can make this longed-for dream a reality. Our high school’s motto has always been “Be the Best You Can Be” and if the required homework proposal is implemented, we really would be. Read the sample out loud, and discuss what elements distinguish it as a prediction. Point out that in order to make the prediction realistic, the student has created a scenario. Imagine . . . we really would be

108 Conclusions – student sample oneDraft Conclusions – student sample one First draft My plan seems very hard for teenagers to achieve, but it is not impossible. Maybe one day I can do this. If not me, hopefully someone else. Revised draft So if my plan really worked and some people helped me out, tons of people who lost their family would feel better. My friends and I would go to NYC and help the people who have no one anymore. They wouldn’t feel as lonely and they would know that there are still good people in the world. I hope one day I or someone else could do this. Each of these examples will fly in separately on the PowerPoint. Discuss with your students the changes this writer has made for the better. The writer has now included a prediction and has omitted the ambiguity at the end of the first draft.

109 Conclusions – student sample twoDraft Conclusions – student sample two First draft In my mind this is pretty doable. But many schools have been trying for a long time to change hazing and have made many errors and are still on the brink of trying to stop this conflict, and need more discipline to make this idea work. What would help to make it work is have a national meeting in Washington D.C. and have all the people willing to help change this problem and have a better result than what it is now. Revised draft My idea compared to others is a plan that can work, but only if we have many people pitch in and help, or make other suggestions on how we could change the problem or hazing younger students. Many people believe there isn’t a problem with bullying at our school, but the truth is they don’t see what’s going on when there is no teacher or adult in sight. If my suggestion were acted on and if the people that bully others could really see what they’re doing to the victims, then I think they would understand that what they’re doing is wrong. So bring this plan into action, and have the bullies learn what life is like for the students they bully. This would stop the hazing in our school. Each of these examples will fly in separately on the PowerPoint. The prompt for this writing asked students to propose an idea that would create positive change in the world and convince their readers that it would work. Discuss with your students the changes in the conclusion this writer has made for the better. In this instance, the writer moved from the general to the specific. There is also now a call to action and a prediction.

110 Conclusion Strategies – applicationDraft Conclusion Strategies – application Return to your baseline paper (“Starting School Two Hours Later”). Consider conclusion strategies you have learned and revise your conclusion to make it more effective. Turn in your original copy and the revision. Have students write a revision of the conclusion to their baseline paper. If you prefer, another paper can be selected or the ineffective conclusion found earlier can be used.

111 Draft Evaluating the quality of the persuasionAssessment Evaluating the quality of the persuasion

112 Persuasive Scoring GuideDraft Persuasive Scoring Guide 1 2 3 4  Has no position.  Shows little or no awareness of the audience.  Has few or no persuasive words, phrases, or strategies to support or show commitment to the position.  Has little or no variety in sentence length and structure.  Includes arguments but does not support position. Has little or no consideration of opposing arguments.  Has little or no elaboration, often only a list of arguments.  Lacks an organizational pattern, or simply lists reasons.  Uses few or no transitions to connect position, arguments, or evidence.  Has no recognizable opening.  Has no recognizable conclusion  Has an unclear or inconsistent position or may lose focus on that position.  Shows some awareness of the audience.  Has some use of persuasive words, phrases, and strategies to support or show commitment to the position.  Uses some variety in sentence length and structure.  Includes arguments that somewhat support position. Has some consideration of the opposing argument(s).  Uses some elaboration to support arguments.  Uses a basic organizational pattern or lacks sentence-to-sentence progression.  Uses basic transitions to connect position, arguments, or evidence.  Uses undeveloped or ineffective openings that are often list-like.  Ends with undeveloped or ineffective conclusions such as a repeated list of reasons.  Has an identifiable position and stays adequately focused on that position.  Shows an adequate awareness of the audience.  Uses adequate persuasive words, phrases, and strategies to support or show commitment to the position.  Uses sentences or phrases that are somewhat varied in length and structure to adequately persuade.  Has arguments that adequately support position. Addresses the opposing argument(s) adequately and, if important, refutes.  Uses adequate elaboration as needed to support arguments.  Organizes adequately and progresses logically to persuade the reader.  Uses transitions adequately to connect position, arguments, and evidence.  Begins with an adequate opening.  Ends with an adequate persuasive conclusion.  Has a clear position and stays purposefully focused on that position.  Shows a consistent awareness of the audience.  Selects effective persuasive words, phrases, and strategies that show commitment and urge the audience to support the position.  Uses sentences or purposeful fragments of varied length and structure effectively to persuade.  Has arguments that effectively support position. Addresses the opposing argument(s) consistently and, if important, refutes.  Uses purposeful elaboration as appropriate to support arguments.  Organizes writing effectively and progresses logically to make the best case to support position.  Uses purposeful transitions to show logical relationships between position, arguments, and evidence.  Begins with a compelling opening that engages the audience, establishes context, and states or implies the position.  Ends with an effective persuasive conclusion, such as a call for action. Pass out copies of the scoring guide to students as obviously the slide is too small to read. (Persuasive Scoring guide.doc in the document folder.) Discuss the scoring guide with students.

113 Assessment Read the paper.Draft Assessment Read the paper. Refer to the scoring guide and identify where this paper best fits. Be able to point to elements of the paper that support your opinion. Discuss as a class. In the document folder you will find Assessment Samples one.doc, Assessment Sample two.doc, and Assessment Sample three.doc, etc. There are fourteen samples in all. Papers are grouped by scores - 4,3, 2, 1. Review the annotations and select the papers you would like to work with during any lesson. Copy those you would like to use and distribute to students. Pass out one of the “3” papers. Possible discussion questions: What are the strengths in this paper? What could be improved? How might you revise this paper to improve it? What persuasive strategies and organizational structures can you identify? Extensions: Students can continue this practice with additional papers in partners and groups. Students can continue this practice with additional papers individually. Students can revise scored papers to improve the score. Students can score their own work and revise accordingly. The following slide reinforces what students are to do with papers.

114 Draft Assessment Score the paper for effective persuasion using the Persuasion Scoring Guide. Analyze what organizational structures and persuasive strategies have been used. Analyze the introduction and conclusion strategies that have been used.