1 Play game: Give each person a balloon with a piece of paper in itPlay game: Give each person a balloon with a piece of paper in it. On some papers will be written the names of STD's about 30% will be blank. Ask the kids if they can tell who has the STD's. Then tell them to pick a partner without telling who it is or pointing them out. Then tell them to pop their balloon's and read the paper to themselves. Ask the kids without an STD to stand. Then tell them "if the person you picked as your partner is setting, that means they have an STD and so do you…sit down." Do this a couple of times until most are setting. Tell kids "just like you couldn't tell who had the STD in the balloon, you can't tell in real life either. Even if you are pure, if you choose someone who is not, you are taking a chance.
2 Dating Relationships Sex
3 You were MADE to have relationships!!Week 1 You were MADE to have relationships!! And NOBODY EVER wants their relationships or marriage to fail…
4 But God has a better plan!!!but it does happen… 70 to 80% of the time The world’s idea of dating and marriage, is NOT working. But God has a better plan!!!
5 If you and your spouse are full blown, over the top, totally radical for Christ, Christians… And you both PUT GOD FIRST in your life… the divorce rate is .2 of 1%
6 To be REALLY happy you have to find the “ONE” for you… And Jesus MUST be the “ONE”!!
7 What you will do or not doWeek 2 To have successful dates and marriage, you need to set your standards higher in… Who you will date What you will do or not do What you expect
8 Play house (live together) Compromise God’s standardsTo have successful dates and marriage, you need to resolve that you WILL NOT… Play house (live together) Compromise God’s standards Sacrifice your relationship with God… EVER!
9 Satan’s way Or God’s way??Week 3 Satan’s way Or God’s way??
10 God’s way leads to happiness!! So what is God’s standard??Satan’s way leads to unhappiness, divorce, broken homes, and child/spouse abuse, and we see it all around us. God’s way leads to happiness!! So what is God’s standard??
11 So how far is too far?… you already know!!...The intimate blessings of marriage are ONLY for marriage, and ANY sexual activity outside marriage is a sin. So how far is too far?… you already know!!...
12 Someone else is probably dating your future spouse…How far do you want them to go??
13 God has only rule about sex!! ONEYou must be in a committed, monogamous MARRIAGE Marriage means ONE MAN, and ONE WOMAN
14 ALL sexual sins (promiscuity, adultery, homosexuality, prostitution, casual sex, sex before marriage, pornography, etc.) are sins because they do not conform to the limit of sex being within a marriage.
15 Sex starts in the mind, so you can't even hint around it, or it will grow into the real thing.That means no thinking about bad things, or dreaming about wrong things. One thing that means is not talking, or texting sexually explicit things with others. Another thing is, girls, you are primarily excited by romance and stories, so for you that might mean reading those romance novels or teen magazines with 50 ways to excite your love life would be wrong. Guys are primarily turned on by sight, so for guys it usually means looking at porn or naked people, or girls that are just about naked would be wrong.
16 And going further is a sin.Anything more than holding hands and lightly kissing is designed for only one thing… to prepare you to go further. And going further is a sin.
17 He created it FOR you and WANTS you to enjoy it!!God is NOT anti-sex!! He created it FOR you and WANTS you to enjoy it!!
18 Doing it wrong can be DEADLY!!!But BECAUSE He wants you to enjoy it, He wants you to do it the right way! Doing it wrong can be DEADLY!!!
19 Week 4… Sex is sticky!!
20 Sex is sticky!! And it is MUCH more than just intercourse!!!Sex joins, it unites, it bonds, it fuses, chemically, biologically, emotionally, physically… Sex is sticky!! And it is MUCH more than just intercourse!!!
21 NOT suddenly go away after marriage.A person who has sex (or any sexual arousal) with multiple partners before marriage, will crave it. That craving will NOT suddenly go away after marriage.
22 That is the way it is suppose to be!!BUT… If the only person you have ever had sex (or any sexual arousal) with is your spouse, you will become more and more addicted to them!!! That is the way it is suppose to be!!
23 In very real, measurable, scientific, biological, and chemical ways, during sexual arousal, two people really do become one, and it does not take intercourse for that to happen.
24 That is why the bible says to be careful about love.It is addictive, we crave it like a drug, but just like a drug we have to be careful or it can ruin us. People CAN and DO get addicted to sex, because it causes the same chemical changes in your brain as drugs.
25 Sex does NOT and CAN NOT make a Godly intimate relationship!BUT… Sex does NOT and CAN NOT make a Godly intimate relationship! Sex is not even required for an intimate relationship!
26 Then we also answered the question… what is sex??
27 If you have an orgasm, it is sexIf you have an orgasm, it is sex. But, biologically speaking anything that causes arousal, releases bonding chemicals in your bloodstream, so biologically LESS than orgasm could be considered "sex".
28 And as far as God is concerned, you are to have NO sexual immorality,NOT EVEN A HINT!!! According to physiological, mental, biological, and chemical facts, and according to God…things MUCH LESS than vaginal sex IS SEX.
29 And now… Week 5
30 You can get an STD without having intercourse.True or False You can get an STD without having intercourse. TRUE
31 Abstinence is the only 100-percent way to prevent pregnancy and STDs.2. True or False Abstinence is the only 100-percent way to prevent pregnancy and STDs. TRUE
32 STDs can cause certain varieties of cancer and infertility.3. True or False STDs can cause certain varieties of cancer and infertility. TRUE
33 If a person has an STD they will have symptoms.4. True or False If a person has an STD they will have symptoms. FALSE
34 You can contract an STD through oral sex.5. True or False You can contract an STD through oral sex. TRUE
35 "safe sex"…condoms will protect you from STD's.6. True or False You can have "safe sex"…condoms will protect you from STD's. ABSOLUTELY 100% FALSE!!
36 How many people have an STD??
37 If you took every man, woman, and child in Missouri…AND all the surrounding states… Arkansas, Kansas, Iowa, Illinois, Oklahoma, and Kentucky
38 You would have about 36 million peopleThe CDC reports there are 56 million people in America that have an STD.
39 How many different kinds of STD’s are there??The CDC reports there are over 50 different kinds of STD’s.
40 Some can make you sterile, some cause cancer, some make you VERY ill for the rest of your life… and a few are fatal.
41 How many new cases of STD’s are there each year??The CDC reports there are over 19 million new cases of STD’s every year.
42 That is just a little MORE than 3 times the population of Missouri… if you count every man, woman, and child.
43 That is 33,000 people who are infected EVERYDAY,AND, 22,000 of them are from 15 to 24 years old.
44 25% (3 million) High School students will be infected with an STD…BEFORE they graduate… EVERY YEAR
45 How much money is spent on STD treatment each year… NOT including HIV??$8,000,000,000.00 ($8 BILLION)
46 Over 10% of the U.S. population has herpes
47 Remember when “satan” in the video said alcohol will help??25% of teens said they were under the influence of drugs or alcohol when they last engaged in sexual activity. Remember when “satan” in the video said alcohol will help??
48 Syphilis, is treatable, BUT because the small sore will disappear in 2 to 8 weeks many believe they are fine. Then the second and third stages start and are progressively worse and can eventually lead to brain, heart, and blood vessel damage.
49 And now there are penicillin resistant strains of it.Chlamydia and gonorrhea is more common among teens than among older people. And now there are penicillin resistant strains of it.
50 Pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), which is almost always caused by gonorrhea or chlamydia, affects 1 million new women each year. About 20,000 are teenagers.
51 PID causes pelvic pain and infertility and is the leading cause of hospitalization for women, (except for pregnancy), during the childbearing years. At least 15% of all American women who are infertile can attribute it to tubal damage caused by PID.
52 PID can result in scarred fallopian tubes which block the passage of a fertilized egg during pregnancy and will cause the tube to rupture. A single chlamydia infection can result in a 25% chance of infertility. With a second infection, the chance of infertility rises to 50%.
53 There has been a 400% increase in tubal pregnancies, most of which were caused by STDs.80% of those infected with an STD don't know it and will unwittingly infect their next sexual partner.
54 Over 6 million people acquire HPV (human papilloma virus), each year, and by age 50, at least 80 percent of women will have acquired genital HPV infection. Most people with HPV do not develop symptoms. HPV is almost 100% responsible for cervical cancer.
55 By causing cancer of the cervix, this virus is killing more women in this country than AIDS… over 5,000 per year. There are 16,000 new cases each year. HPV can also result in painful intercourse for years after infection even though other visible signs of disease have disappeared.
56 There are 11,000 HPV-associated cases of throat cancer a year.People who have had more than five oral-sex partners in their lifetime are 250% more likely to develop throat cancer than those who do not have oral sex.
57 The type of cell involved in mouth and cervical cancer is the sameThe type of cell involved in mouth and cervical cancer is the same. In the past ten years there has been a 50% increase in the numbers of younger people developing oral cancer.
58 HPV can result in precancer or cancer of the genitals.HPV, is an extremely common STD. At the University of California, Berkeley, 46% of the sexually active coeds were infected with HPV. HPV is the major cause of venereal warts. HPV can result in precancer or cancer of the genitals.
59 What do teens believe about STD’s?
60 In a recent survey, 87% of teens said they do not believe they are at risk for HIV-AIDS infection.BUT half of all new HIV infections occur among teens, and once EVERY hour, 24/7/365, a teen is given this death sentence.
61 Unless something changes, In the U.S. alone, there are between 1 and 2 million infected with this disease. Unless something changes, all of these people will die from this disease.
62 40% of teens surveyed believe that all forms of contraceptive's including the “pill” and “shot” protect against STDs… of course they don't.
63 39% of teens, including those who had abstinence education, consider oral and anal sex to be abstinent behaviors and do not think these behaviors put you at risk for STD's.
64 Most teens believed they are tested during routine medical examinations for major STDs….YOU ARE NOT!!
65 Teenagers Face a Greater Risk from STDs
66 Teens are up to 10 times more likely to develop certain STD's, cancers, and bacteria's, than a older adult exposed to the same threat.
67 Teens are also having more abortions …over 320,000 per year. Abortions are NOT safe for anyone, but are especially dangerous for teens.
68 Oral contraceptives are not as effective with teens.18% of teen girls using oral contraceptives become pregnant every year.
69 This is all the result of a society that has abandoned God's design for sex within marriage.NONE of these things would happen IF people obeyed God!!!
70 People who have sex at least 4 times a week live longer!!BUT ONLY IF THEY ARE MARRIED!! Unmarried people who have sex have a DECREASED life expectancy!! I’ve just spent 4 weeks telling you to not have sex before marriage, now I’m telling you if you do have sex you will live longer!!!??? Yes, but ONLY if you do it God’s way!!!
71 Once again the Bible is proven TRUE!!!
72 make SURE and practice safe sex!!!And the worlds message to you??... With all this bad stuff you need to make SURE and practice safe sex!!!
73 n
74 Injuries happen 4% of the time and death happens 1/10 of 1%Would you jump?? Most people wouldn’t!! Why? Injuries happen 4% of the time and death happens 1/10 of 1% (that means that out of every 1000 jumps, someone dies)
75 The other 7 or 8 people either die or are hurt VERY badly!!”What if there were an “expert” at the top of the cliff saying… “don’t worry! Out of every 10 people who jump, 2 or 3 live!! The other 7 or 8 people either die or are hurt VERY badly!!” Now would you jump??
76 There are MANY “experts” telling you…“don’t worry, a condom will keep you safe” (only 7 or 8 out of every 10 get a disease or pregnant or even die!!)
77 Depending on the disease, condoms have a 30 to 100% failure rate!!!
78 The Washington, D.C., Board of Education has set “Healthy Learning Standards” that would encourage condom use and teach eighth-graders that they “may begin to feel romantically and/or sexually attracted to people of a different gender and/or to people of the same gender.”
79 They should be telling you DON'T JUMP!!!You should be FURIOUS at those people telling you to "at least wear a condom“!! They should be telling you DON'T JUMP!!!
80 Here is another reason you should be FURIOUS!...The reason they are telling you to wear a condom is NOT because they think it will always protect you (they know better).
81 THAT SHOULD MAKE YOU MAD!!!!!!They are telling you to use a condom because they think you are to stupid to make good choices… THAT SHOULD MAKE YOU MAD!!!!!! They think teens WILL have sex and you can’t stop it and some protection is better than none.
82 For over 20 of them condoms provide NO protection at all.There are over 50 different kinds of STD's, some make you sick, some cause cancer, some will kill you. For over 20 of them condoms provide NO protection at all. And condoms provide very limited protection for the other 30 STD's.
83 Condom Statistics
84 Condoms provided virtually no additional protection from STDs.At Rutgers University 39% of the sexually active students were infected with one or more STDs The percentage was the SAME from students who did, and students who did not wear comdoms. Condoms provided virtually no additional protection from STDs.
85 The FDA allows one in 250 condoms to be defective.Condoms break on average 8% of the time and slip off 7% of the time. This percentage is average… the percentage for teens is MUCH higher… 36%!!
86 A Dept. of Health and Human Services report says… "one of every five batches of condoms tested...failed to meet minimum standards for leaks." "Consumer Reports" says… FDA inspectors reject one out of every ten condoms due to leaks.
87 The “perfect use” pregnancy rate of condoms is 2%Real world rate is 12 to 15% Teen rate is 36% What would the failure rate be if you could get pregnant 365 days a year instead of 12-24??
88 If you could get pregnant 365 days a year instead of 24…. Condoms would provide virtually NO protection against pregnancy. But guess what….
89 Condoms provide considerably LESS protection against STDs than they do against pregnancy.AND You CAN get STD's 365 days a year
90 ALL condoms have holes in them!!They are about 5 microns... The aids virus is 0.1 microns (4 millionths of an inch) in size
91 HIV, the virus that causes AIDS, are 450 times smaller than sperm.
92 That is like a ping-pong ball going through a basketball hoop.Which means the AIDS virus is 50 times smaller than the microscopic holes in condoms! That is like a ping-pong ball going through a basketball hoop.
93 The result? 150% rise in the rate of HIV infection.Former Surgeon General, Joycelyn Elders, thought condoms should be promoted in schools. So she had condoms freely dispensed at 24 high school-based health clinics. The result? 150% rise in the rate of HIV infection.
94 In Washington DC, 800 sexologists gathered at the National Conference on HIV.They were asked if they would trust a condom to protect them during intercourse with a known HIV-infected person.
95 condom, but they tell us that condoms provide “safe sex.”NONE said they would. They would not trust a condom, but they tell us that condoms provide “safe sex.” That should make you MAD!!!
96 "Simply put, condoms fail"Simply put, condoms fail. And condoms fail at a rate unacceptable for me as a physician to endorse them as a strategy to be promoted as meaningful AIDS protection." Dr. Robert Renfield, chief of retro-viral research, Walter Reed Army Institute
97 Canadian physician and researcher"Relying on condoms for ‘protection’ can mean lifelong disease, suffering, and even death for you or for someone you love." Dr. Andre Lafrance, Canadian physician and researcher
98 "Saying that the use of condoms is ‘safe sex’ is in fact playing Russian roulette. A lot of people will die in this dangerous game." Dr. Teresa Crenshaw, member of the U.S. Presidential AIDS Commission and past president of the American Association of Sex Educators
99 But you haven’t heard the worst part yet!!!!
100 STDs are frequently passed through "skin to skin" contact even when condoms are used perfectly and don't fail.
101 The bacterial or viral germs that cause many serious STDs (such as HPV, chlamydia, herpes, and syphilis) may infect anywhere in the male or female genital areas.
102 There are over 50 different kinds of STD's and for over 20 of themcondoms provide NO protection at all.
103 AIDS is said to be “incurable”.BILLIONS of dollars are spent every year on STD’s for treatment, prevention, and research. AIDS is said to be “incurable”.
104 But ALL STD’s could be eliminated in ONE GENERATION… For FREE… IF WE WOULD JUST OBEY GOD!!
105 When someone tells you that you can have sex before marriage… just wear a condomGET MAD!!!!!
106 This true story about Olympic skier Jill Kinmont.Remember the story I told you last week? Here is another story… It is about the “perfect” couple that everyone envied and everyone thought had a bright future. This true story about Olympic skier Jill Kinmont. Last weeks story…… There was a young couple who were dating and trying to do what God wanted them to do. They made vows to not have sex before marriage and they kept those vows. They were both virgins on their wedding night. They had a beautiful wedding and reception then left in great anticipation of their honeymoon night, their first night together. But tragedy struck. On the way to the hotel, they were in an accident and the bride was injured very badly. She was in the hospital and was told she was paralyzed from the neck down and would be for the rest of her life. Of course they were both devastated. Lots of men would have left her, but he didn't. She couldn't do anything for herself. He had to dress her, bath her, tend to her personal needs, brush her teeth, everything. She got very depressed and in her desperation, told her husband that she couldn't please him and he should leave her and find someone else. He didn't and they have been together for many, many years now. They have never had sex, she will never know what it feels like to have sex, and neither will he, not because of physical disability, but because of a choice. A choice to remain loyal and faithful to his wife. How is he able to do this… true love. Let me ask you what would be worse, never having sex, never knowing what she was missing, or only having memories of sex with someone other than her husband and knowing what she is missing with him?? New story….. In 1954, Jill Kinmont won two medals in the ski competitions. Then in 1956, she plunged off the side of a mountain during the Snow Cup Race. Her neck was broken and her body paralyzed from the shoulders down for life. Her career ended in that paralyzing accident. Her fiancée unable to bear the weight of her disability and he left her. The story is portrayed in the movie, "The Other Side of the Mountain". This is NOT true love. This is what most people think love is…what can I get out of it. And when I don’t get anything from it… I’m done.
107 True love is, "I love you, period.That is not true love. True love is, "I love you, period. I love you even if someone better looking comes along, even if you change, even if you have zoo breath in the morning. I place your needs above my own." This is the kind of love that the couple I talked about last week had.
108 In the Bible it says the greatest thing is love…don't confuse sex and love.
109 A marriage can last without sex but it CAN’T last without Love andSEX IS NOT LOVE
110 Good sex WILL NOT and CAN NOT make a good marriage, but a good, Godly, loving marriage will allow for good sex to happen!!
111 You don't need to be an experienced lover to please your spouse.I don’t want to look dumb on my wedding night… I need experience before marriage You don't need to be an experienced lover to please your spouse. You can learn to be a great lover after marriage.
112 If the only person you have ever had sex, or sexual contact with is your spouse, then you have nothing to compare them to. How you have sex with the first person you are with, will form many of your ideas about “perfect” sex. That should happen with your husband/wife!!
113 7 steps to Godly dating…
114 1. Set limits…I will NOT… A. Sacrifice my relationship with God… EVER!! B. Compromise God’s standards. C. Play house.
115 2. Make tangible commitments
116 3. Avoid situations that could compromise God’s values.
117 4. Have an accountability partner.
118 5. Prayer
119 6. Keep your mind pure. You can NOT expose your thoughts to sexual things and expect your body not to follow.
120 Wrong actions begin with wrong thinking.Sex starts between the ears long before it is between the legs.
121 7. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!
122 If you DON’T have sex before marriage… you are in the MAJORITY!!Some of your friends might tell you if you don’t have sex your weird because EVERYONE is doing it. THAT IS NOT TRUE!!! If you DON’T have sex before marriage… you are in the MAJORITY!! Contrary to popular belief, not all teens are having sex! As a matter of fact, recently the percentage of teens having sex has falling BELOW 50%. So if you are NOT having sex during your teen years… you are in the MAJORITY!!!!
123 What if I have already gone too far??
124 You can still have a happy, long lasting, Godly marriage.IF you turn to God, ask forgiveness, repent, put God first in your life, AND IF you choose a mate that will do the same.
125 Satan will tell you that if you have messed up, then you can just forget about it, your not a virgin anymore, so go ahead, forget God, and have all the sex you want, try everything.
126 IF YOU DO THAT, YOU WILL MAKE A BAD SITUATION INFINITELY WORSE!!!
127 Satan is a liar and he is in a VERY REAL way, trying to kill you.
128 What if someone forced themselves on you?It is NOT your fault or your choice and God will NOT hold that against you… You ARE PURE in His eyes!! It is a very real possibility this will have happened to someone in your group. It needs to be EMPHSIZED that they are still PURE… it was NOT their choice or their fault.
129 What you are doing now WILL effect your married sex life, either for good or bad.What you do or don't do, can make the difference between a wonderful, happy marriage and a marriage with regrets and problems.
130 Guys, it is your job to be the spiritual leader…ACT LIKE IT!!!
131 If you have to give sex to get love, that person DOES NOTGirls, If you have to give sex to get love, that person DOES NOT LOVE YOU!!
132 and will honor and respect you.A man who TRULY cares about you and loves you, will want God’s best for you and will honor and respect you.
133 God’s way WORKS!!! 100% of the time… NO EXCEPTIONS!!
134 You have to be full blown, But you can’t just be a “church goer”. You have to be full blown, over the top, totally radical for Christ, Christian!
135 If you travel the same road as the rest of the world you WILL end up at the same destination
136 If you want a different result, you have to take a different path.
137 What path are you on??
138